Saying the Darndest Things

Do any of you remember Art Linkletter?

When I was very young, I came home from school every afternoon to find my mother watching Linkletter’s talk show on television. Her favorite segment was when he interviewed young children, who would invariably make some intentionally humorous comment. Linkletter later wrote a book called Kids Say the Darndest Things, which stemmed from these segments.

I think that Linkletter would have gotten a kick out of some of the things Kai has said recently.

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When we met with Kai’s teacher at school last month, she told us about how, at the beginning of the school year, Kai “fired” her at least once a day. She thought that they had each adjusted to each other as the firings had become much less frequent these days.

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We use a Point Store at home to try to incentivize Kai for certain behaviors. He has a lot of input into the apps, games, or books that are “sold” in the store, while my wife and I set the price, the number of points he has to earn to win the prize.

On a recent occasion, I did not immediately tell him if we would include a certain prize in the Point Store, or how much we would price it at if we did include it. I was not familiar with the app and wanted to research it more before deciding. But as I had to go to work, I did not have time to do that at the moment.

I’ll do it later, I promised Kai.

He responded, “I’ll text you.”

Huh?

I don’t need my nine-year old texting me! Certainly not about some app that he wants.

I told him that I would get to it when I got home. And that satisfied him.

This time, anyway.

* * * * *
We visited a few assisted living places the other day. At the first place, the woman we met with introduced herself to the three of us.

Kai immediately spoke up.

“We’re looking for a place for my dad’s dad to live. Why is this a good place?”

Ha, no pleasantries with this guy. Let’s get right to it.

After we had toured the facility and wrapped up our visit, the woman told Kai to be sure to be “just as tough on the person you meet with at the next place.”

* * * * *
The three of us were playing a Mario Party game on the Wii the other night. Kai was winning while my wife and I were battling to stay out of last place.

My wife was struggling with one of the mini games so Kai started giving her advice on when to press the buttons.

I grumbled that he didn’t have to help Mom.

“But I want to protect my mom!”

My wife thought that was incredibly sweet. I thought so, too. Though, I continued to grumble.

* * * * *
All this from a boy who, at one time, thought might never say more than two words.

Art Linkletter would have loved it!