Thursday, January 9, 2014

Honoring His “First Father”

It is a Jewish custom to light a special candle that burns for 24 hours, called a Yahrzeit candle, on the anniversary of the death of a loved one. Yesterday marked the tenth year that my wife has been lighting one for her late husband, Kai’s biological father.

It wasn’t until the past few years that Kai even noticed that my wife did this. Having been in his own world much of the time before, he didn’t seem to notice things like that before.

But over the past couple of years, we have been filling Kai in more and more about his “first father” as he likes to say.

Yesterday, I understand that he prayed with Mom as she lit the candle. And when I got home from work he told me all about it.

When Kai was younger, I wasn’t sure he would be able to comprehend his somewhat complicated family background. That he does, and has such maturity and understanding of what yesterday meant to his mom is quite heartwarming.


  1. It is when a child starts showing maturity that a parent starts to know true pride. The parent then knows that he is doing something right... and that he may start to not worry so much... because he knows that his child is on the right path. There is no greater love from a child than that which is innocently demonstrated in his actions...and it is his positive actions which say everything about his parents. You have much to be proud of.

    1. He was very understanding that "this is Mom's saddest day." We were very proud of his maturity and compassion.


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