Hakone

A couple hours southwest of Tokyo, Hakone is set in scenic mountains. The five of us, including my wife’s parents, left Tokyo on Tuesday morning, with my father-in-law impressively maneuvering through rush-hour traffic. Streets are very crowded, of course, but the challenge is also that they are a bit narrower than many of the roads back home. And it’s not just the cars that crowd the narrow streets, but bicycles as well. I think it would be a challenge for me to drive, but I felt in capable hands with my father-in-law.

We arrived in Hakone late morning. Kai got mad when the wifi at the hotel didn’t work on his iPad. I had no sympathy as he had been on his iPad for a long time before we left his grandparents’ house in the morning. Could he not go more than a couple hours without having to get online? I swear the boy is going to push me to cut off his online time completely if he can’t accept some limitations like this.

Hakone is famous for hot springs, and the main attraction of our stay there would be the Yunessun, a hot springs spa and water amusement park, which was right across the street from our hotel.

The first thing that Kai wanted to do was the water slides. This was a major change as before he was always too scared to go on slides, especially body slides. And in places where swim goggles are not permitted, like this, he would get very anxious at the thought of getting water in his eyes.

So I was pleased that he wanted to go on slides. The first time, he spread his legs and arms to slow his speed. But at least he went down. And then wanted to go down again.

We did it several times before the grownups got hungry and wanted to eat lunch.

As walked back through the main indoor pool area, a simulated storm was brewing complete with thunder sound effects and flashing light.

Kai got scared and angry.

He started yelling how we had to leave right now. And what a terrible place it was.

I asked him why he was scared. He said that storms are dangerous and you should not be in the pool when there’s a storm. I told him that it was a fake storm, and that fake ones are not dangerous. He did not seem to care.

His anger escalated as the line for lunch was long.

I took him back to the slides while Mom and Jiji waited in line to get lunch.

When we got back to lunch, he was a bit settled down.

After lunch, we went to the other side of the park, the place where they have numerous hot springs spas. We tried each one.

We went in the coffee spa, which is said to contain real coffee made with hot spring water.

Then the green tea spa. And the wine spa. And several more.

Kai didn’t particularly care about those. And after a short time he had had enough. He wanted to go to the hotel to relax, which is his code for using his iPad.

I told him that once we left, we would not be able to get back in. He didn’t care; he wanted to leave. And so, before 2PM, we had finished up the main thing we drove up here for.

We went to our hotel room and I was able to get his iPad to connect to the wifi. My wife went for a massage.

Later, Kai and I went to use the swimming pool.

It was the largest hotel swimming pool I’ve ever seen.

The odd thing about the pool is that it is very deep. It was 1 meter deep on the shallow end, quickly drops to 2 meters, and then is 3 meters on the deep end. For those of you who, like me, can’t do the conversion, I could touch bottom at 1 meter, but even before 2 meters I no longer could.

Kai is now an excellent swimmer with great confidence so he wanted to race to the deep end. But as I have no such confidence in my own swimming abilities, I told him that we should stay at the shallow end. I didn’t want to put a damper on the vacation by drowning.

We stayed at the pool a good long time, long enough for Mom to finish her massage and join us.

And then it was time to use the Japanese bath.

For those not familiar, it is a custom for Japanese to take public baths together, particularly at onsen (hot springs) like this. Men and women are in separate areas, but otherwise you are naked with total strangers.

Kai has never been shy about his body, so he had no qualms about going to the bath. I, on the other hand, had to put my shyness to the backburner to partake of this custom.

I took Kai into the men’s side where we disrobed and then went to the shower room where we could clean ourselves before going into the bath itself. There were a few other people in the room, including the cleaning lady.

I made sure that Kai cleaned himself and rinsed off nicely. And then we went to the outdoor bath.

The water in the onsen is very hot. Kai does not like a very hot bath at home but he went in this one without complaint. Once immersed in the water, you get used to the warmth and start to relax.

We didn’t stay long, but it was long enough to get me to relax.

Later we went to the buffet dinner at the hotel. Kai loved that he could get unlimited dessert, which I allowed as he had eaten a full portion of some main dishes.

And so we had experienced a few bumps, but the day ended on a happy note.

But the challenges would build the next day.

Beginning to Explore Japan

After arriving in Tokyo on Sunday, we began exploring on Monday. We have a few days here before my sister and her family arrive so we decided to take the time to do things that Kai specifically might enjoy.

My father-in-law drove us the Rainbow Bridge over to Odaiba, a man-made island that is home to many forms of entertainment.

We spent the morning at Joypolis, and indoor amusement park run by Sega. There was a line to get in, and the noise at the entrance was quite loud between the crowd, blaring music, and all of the greeters shouting enthusiastically as patrons entered. Frankly, it was too much for me, and I was hoping that we would get inside before it all became too much for Kai. Thankfully we did.

We rode on several different rides. Kai was anxious as we waited to go on a simulated glider ride. It was a thrill ride, but I saw smiles on his face throughout despite his early anxiety.

Next was a simulated river raft ride.

My wife and I were happy that the announcements that you might get wet was in Japanese. Alas, Kai saw the pictorial signs and figured it out, and that got him anxious. But once again, he was all smiles during the ride itself.

My personal highlight at Joypolis was the men’s room where each urinal featured an animated video that activated when you started peeing. The video at my urinal was of a statue that peed into a fountain, and it measured your pee in ml, stopping when you stopped.

After that, we saw the Statue of Liberty.

Then, it was time for lunch at a buffet restaurant.

Then we walked over to the Sony ExploraScience Museum. It was not a big place, but every exhibit was interesting to Kai.

We then went shopping as Kai’s grandmother had given him a gift card. He found Nanoblocks, a Japanese form of Lego that features miniature blocks about a fourth the size of Legos.

We went for dinner at a kaitenzushi restaurant, where plates of sushi and other goodies go by on a conveyer belt. You take a plate of anything you want to eat.

At the end of the meal, they come by and count your plates. As you can see, we had quite a few.

And that was our Monday. We’re off to a busy Tuesday.

We Have Arrived!

The flight over to Japan was gratefully uneventful.

After a bit of anxiety at takeoff,

Kai was in bliss the whole 13 hours on the plane, watching movies on his iPad the whole time except for a couple breaks to try out the in-flight entertainment that including some video games.

I tried to get him to nap a little bit. I didn’t want him overly tired when we arrived, but I think he could go days without sleep with the stimulus of digital entertainment.

I tried to nap as well, but it’s hard when your son keeps interrupting to tell you where we are in the flight, or asking you to open the window shad so that he could look outside.

When we landed at Narita, Kai was well behaved waiting in line to go through Customs, and was happy to see his grandfather who met us at the airport.

Kai only got agitated when he found out that Jiji probably didn’t have wifi at his place (though we found out later that he does). The boy likes to stay connected, and the thought of going three days without wifi until we got to a hotel that had it was intolerable. That led to him laying on the ground and complaining that it was too hot. And we hadn’t even done anything yet.

But that episode didn’t last long when once we got in his grandfather’s car as he fell asleep before we reached our home for the next couple days.

We drove through a torrential rainstorm and Kai didn’t get too anxious.

Once we arrived, we had a hot Japanese bath, followed by a hearty Japanese dinner (fried shrimp for Kai, unagi (eel) for the rest of us),

My wife and I were soon ready for bed. Kai probably could have stayed up for hours, but we thankfully got him asleep so that we could sleep, too.

So we are off to a good start. But this morning will bring the first real challenges as we venture out to start our sightseeing.

Let’s see how it goes.

Departure Day

As the day of departure for Japan has arrived, some of my stress has faded into the background as I am finally starting to get excited about the trip.

Kai has been more nervous than excited, but this morning he was up at 6:30, excited about the vacation.

Everyone asks how he will do on the long flight – 13 hours. I think that will actually be one of the easiest parts of the trip as he can watch movies on his iPad to his heart’s content.

We’re at the airport and have happy faces so far.

We’ll soon be off. Wish us well.

Tanoshii: Anticipation of Our Vacation

Everyone at work asks the same question: “Are you excited about your vacation?”

And everyone looks at me quizzically when I say that I’m much more stressed out than excited. They look as if I’m crazy that I’m not heads-over-heels excited about our dream journey of going to Japan.

When my sister and I were kids, in the days leading up to our annual summer trips, our mom would always tell us that tanoshii ga ichiban i toki, meaning that the anticipation of the vacation was the best part. I don’t know if I fully agreed with that; the trips themselves were usually pretty great, too, but I now understand what she meant. The time leading up to the vacation is when you’re supposed to be excited.

So, why am I not?

Maybe it’s because I’m thinking about all the stressful experiences we have had with Kai on previous vacations.

There was the time in the Great Smoky Mountains when Kai yelled and screamed the entire way up the not-all-that-long hike to the top of Clingman’s Dome.

Then there was the time last summer in the Tetons when Kai was barely able to tolerate the long wait for the boat that would take us back across the lake to our car. The agony of that wait still seers in my memories.

And then there was the awful time when Kai had a very huge public meltdown at the aquarium at Niagara Falls when he didn’t get his turn to feed the seals because they ran out of fish.

And so I’m pretty sure something will happen on this trip, too. It always does.

And as destinations go, Japan will probably be one of the more challenging ones for Kai.

Japan is a small country with many people. And so it is very crowded in the big cities. Kai hates crowds.

Many people smoke in Japan, and they don’t have the non-smoking areas that we have here. Kai hates smoke.

Summer is not the ideal time to visit Japan. It is very hot and humid there now. Kai hates heat and humidity.

There are many places in Japan that abound with colors, noises, and activities. For Kai, that translates into an overload of stimuli.

There will be plenty of magnificent sights to see. Everyone will want to take their time to take it all in as this may be a once-in-a-lifetime experience for many of us. Kai doesn’t tolerate waiting very well.

And so, there is no doubt in my mind that Kai will get very upset. The only questions are when, where, how often, and how severe.

It is hard to deal with situations when Kai gets upset at home. It is more challenging when we face these types of situations in public.

But it will be even more difficult when things like this impact, not just me and my wife, but all of our family members who will be with us.

I so want this to be a great experience for everyone. I so fear that there will be major blowups that could ruin the trip for all.

Some have advised me not to worry about it. But that is an impossibility.

Besides, I think the best way to minimize the problems is to try to proactively act as best we can.

We have tried to set expectations with Kai. We have warned him of the smoke and crowds and waiting and all that. We have prepared a schedule so he knows what we might do each day. We are trying to come up with strategies for when challenges arise… for instance, my wife or I taking him back to the hotel to get a break.

But in the end I think there is only so much we can do.

And that reminds me of another of my mom’s sayings: shikata ga nai, which means it cannot be helped.

I oftentimes feel like I get disappointed when my expectations are too high. Maybe it will turn out to be the opposite this time.

We Are Headed For Japan

We made the decision last fall, on the drive home after spending Thanksgiving with my sister and her family.

We had just dropped my dad off at his house where he was still living on his own at the time, but it had become obvious by then that he needed to move into an assisted living facility.

Our dream vacation for my wife and I had been to visit Japan with Kai, so he could see the country where his mother was born and raised, and visit his grandparents in their homeland.

We had been waiting to go until Kai was old enough to appreciate and remember the trip, but also until he was able to cope with things better.

But on that drive home after Thanksgiving, my wife and I were contemplative. Her parents are still very sharp of mind and very healthy. But seeing my dad’s decline reminded us both that we should not take anything for granted.

And so we decided that the three of us would make the big pilgrimage this summer to visit them and to travel around my wife’s home country. Better to go now, a few years too early in terms of Kai’s readiness, perhaps, than to wait and have regrets later.

As we drove home that day, my wife asked if I wanted to invite my sister and her family to join us. The more I thought about it, the more excited I was about the idea of all of us having this momentous adventure together.

It was also an ideal time for them, in some ways. Both of their kids, my nephews, would have finished college but not be so far along in careers or relationships that would get in the way of making this journey. The only question in our minds was whether the boys would want to go; would they want to travel with us old folks?

The answer, it turned out, is yes. Apparently it took them all of a few seconds to say yes when my sister and brother-in-law posed the question.

“What would make you think that we wouldn’t want to go?” one of them asked us later.

And so, we will soon be on our way to Japan.

It is an exciting time, yes. But as the trip has drawn near, our most prevalent feeling has not been excitement. It has been stress.

More on that in my next post.

Summer Weekend – Strawberry Picking and Water Fun

We went to up to Wisconsin this weekend for our annual outing to pick our own strawberries. The strawberries were the largest we’ve ever seen them. And the fields were crowded with more people than ever.

While the strawberries were large, they weren’t as sweet as ones we’ve had in the past. But Kai wasn’t complaining about that.

Though he did start to grumble about the heat. But after we had picked two boxes of berries, I think all of us were ready to go get lunch at our traditional favorite, The Brat Stop.

After we got home, my wife was ready to rest. Kai was ready to go to the beach.

So he and I went out for a couple of hours. The water was really cold, so after taking a dip up to our ankles, and splashing each other with water shooters, Kai was content to stay on shore and try to skip stones.

The next day, I took him to a birthday party at a home that had a large swimming pool. Kai had a great time swimming and playing with all the water toys, though he seemed pretty content to do his own thing and did not interact much with the other kids.

He’s a happy kid whenever there’s a swimming pool or beach so those will be our common weekend outings this summer.

Ah, if only life were one long summer weekend.

Challenges and the 5K

Our challenges with Kai have continued the past couple of weeks.

During the short break between the end of the school year and the beginning of summer school, we went up to Michigan. We left Kai with his grandparents for two days/one night while my wife and I went to my dad’s old house along with my sister and brother-in-law to go through all of the stuff that is still there.

We had left Kai with his grandparents a couple of months earlier, and that time all went relatively well. This time, not so much.

Kai gave his grandparents a hard time, not listening and oftentimes refusing to do anything other than playing on the iPad. His grandfather is more like me in that he is not one to put up with such behavior, and apparently Kai didn’t like it when he didn’t get his way.

He fired his grandfather, apparently similar to how he has fired me and his teachers many times in the past.

Sigh.

You don’t fire your grandfather.

You can be sure that we had a good talk with Kai on the car ride home. But one of our challenges has been that reasoning does not seem to always work well with him.

How do you correct behavior when he does not seem to comprehend what he did wrong?

* * * * *
The day after we got home from Michigan, Kai started summer school. He also transitioned into his fifth grade classroom.

He did not have an auspicious start.

He had an incident in the very first moment of his first day of fifth grade.

He had some problem with saying the Pledge of Allegiance. We are not sure what his issue with the Pledge is, but we had heard from him before that he does not like it. This time he disrupted class and got him off to a rocky start.

It didn’t get much better.

He had other incidents during the week.

But the worst was at the very end of the week.

While riding the van back to school after a field trip to the aquarium in the city, Kai said that he had to use the bathroom. This, despite having used the bathroom just prior to getting on the van. When the driver could not find a bathroom, Kai dropped his pants and peed right in the van. While we can’t say for sure, it sounds like he did it out of anger rather than because he truly could not hold it.

* * * * *
The 5K that we have been training for was run yesterday.

We weren’t nearly as ready for it as I had wanted to be. Every time I wanted to increase the distance of our training runs, Kai complained about being too tired to run. Or that his leg was sore. Or some other reason why he could not run any more. So, the longest we had run prior to the race was about half of the 5K distance we would have to cover.

I was not looking forward to the race.

But Kai seemed happy prior to the race.

He even was well behaved during the national anthem.

And when we started he ran nicely.

But after a mile or so, he was barely walking, let alone running. Kai was loudly complaining that he could not do any more.

One of his classmates caught up to us, and he encouraged Kai to keep going. Kai kept whining but we kept moving, occasionally jogging for a while before slowing down to walk.

When we were within a half mile or so of the finish, we could see the end and hear the crowd at the end. Kai started to regain energy.

He ran that entire last half mile, finishing up with a strong sprint that outpaced his mom and me.

It wasn’t painless, but it was an accomplishment, of sorts.

He did it. Ultimately, he didn't give up. He finished strong.

UPDATED for the following photo of Kai and me crossing the finish line (courtesy of one of the staff at Kai's school):

Now, hopefully we can all persevere through our other challenges and find a way to the finish line.

Video of Kai’s Talent Show Performance

My wife reported that the talent show at Kai’s school featured quite an array of performances. There were kids who danced, and those who sang. Some played musical instruments, while others had more unique talents. One boy balanced peacock feathers on his hand, while another showed off his Jenga skills. One girl demonstrated why she may be the “world’s fastest paper airplane maker.”

In all, there were 19 performers, which was nearly half of the students at the school. We were impressed that so many had the courage and confidence to get up in front of the whole school and perform. It was something I never would have been able to do at that age.

Kai had been practicing his routine for several weeks. We were initially very surprised that he wanted to sing at the talent show, and at first, my wife, especially, was concerned that he might make a fool of himself in front of the whole school. But as we had him keep working on his performance of “What Does the Fox Say?” we started to see him put his personality into his performance and I started to smile, rather than cringe, when I saw him practice.

As described yesterday, Kai did not perform live, and we were disappointed.

But during the show he sat nicely and watched the kids who did perform, which was a triumph of sorts in itself.

The video I took of him practicing was shown as the grand finale. Two staff members in fox costume got up and danced along while Kai’s performance was shown on the widescreen. My wife said it was a big hit.

Maybe next year he will be able to perform live.

But for now, we will enjoy this performance:

School Year Winding Down, Emphasis on Down

Our son’s fourth-grade school year is rapidly coming to an end, and with the usual end-of-year changes, along with modifications to his medication, things are not ending on a high note.

Kai’s elementary school goes from kindergarten through fifth grade. Ever since Kai has been attending, there has always been just one fifth-grade class, always with the same teacher, Ms. S. When Kai was in second grade, he went to Ms. S’s class for math, and ever since then he expected that he would be returning to her class when he was a fifth grader. (Since then, he has been taught math individually as no one else in his school has been at his level).

We recently learned that next year there will be two fifth-grade classrooms for the first time due to the larger number of kids at that level. The “other” fifth grade classroom will be taught by Ms. L. who has taught third and fourth graders previously. Kai will be in Ms. L’s classroom.

From what I can tell, Ms. L will be a fine teacher for Kai, but he was very disappointed when he heard the surprising news that he would not be in Ms. S’s class. Kai perceives Ms. L to be the teacher of younger children, and he thought it reflected poorly on him that he was chosen for this classroom. He also was upset that most of his close friends will be in the other fifth grade class. All that is on top of the fact that moving to a new class is a bit anxious for any child, and that Kai, like many kids with autism, does not take surprises well.

Yesterday he visited his new classroom for the first time. It did not go well.

We were told that Kai was very disrespectful to some of his new classmates and the teacher. It is distressing to hear that he reacted that way, and we will have to find a way to curb that type of behavior.

Aside from the stress of transitioning to a new teacher and class, this time of year is also difficult because the regular schedule is disrupted for special activities. Among them are practice sessions for an upcoming talent show (more on that in another post), as well as practices for a group performance at the end-of-year recognition ceremony.

We also recently consulted with Kai’s psychiatrist about altering his medication. He had an okay school year, but we thought it would be good to tweak his medication and see how things changed.

We cut back on one of his meds that treats ADHD and it appeared that Kai got more distracted. It was hard to get him to focus on his homework, especially. His school reported increased silliness and less concentration on schoolwork. So, we have gone back to his original dosage.

We also eliminated the small dose of risperidone that had been taking to help control his anger. We were troubled by its side effects, including weight gain and longer-term health risks. During the first couple weeks after we eliminated this drug, we noticed no difference in his anger. But now that he is having more stressful times at school, Kai’s irritability and anger is noticeably higher.

Yesterday, my wife had to go to school to bring a new shirt for Kai after he chewed up the one he was wearing. This had once been a common occurrence, but we thought we had seen the last of it after many months of no incidents like this.

And so, we will have to consider putting Kai back on the risperidone, or finding an alternative drug to try. We had hoped that Kai’s improvements were the result of therapy and maturity, but apparently the drugs were at least partly responsible as well.

School year is winding down. We need to get our boy back up on the right path.

Water Balloons

The water from the hose was COLD!

But then it was my turn...

Kai loved it!

Motivated to Get in Shape

We took Kai to a new pediatrician a few weeks ago. He showed us an interesting chart that showed Kai’s height and weight at various ages. He told us that Kai was currently at the 30th percentile for height, and 80th percentile for weight. Not a good combination.

We have been aware for some time now that Kai was overweight. His diet has generally been pretty good – few processed foods, very little sodas and packaged juices, a good amount of vegetables and fruits, and desserts only on days that he has a lot of exercise – but he still has the bloated belly that he’s had all his life (and which is common in kids with autism).

Though I did find out at the doctor’s office that my wife had been taking Kai to McDonald’s three days a week when they did not have time to come home after school before he has to go to therapy. She decided that from now on, she would prepare something healthier for him to eat in the car.

We know that exercise is important, so we have tried to make sure he is physically active. He has his regular weekly swim lesson, weekly fitness group led by his swim instructor, his weekly boxing class (that is now on break for the summer), our weekend morning runs, and short exercises on weekday mornings.

But all that did not seem to be enough. We needed to do more.

We also decided that though we could try to do these things, it was important for Kai himself to want to embrace healthier habits.

And the best incentive to motivate him was to tie his fitness to the amount of time he could use the iPad.

My wife has a scale that measures body fat percentage in addition to a person’s weight. Since he is a growing boy, we thought that body fat percentage, rather than weight, would be the best measure. We decided that we would measure Kai’s body fat every week at the same time, on Saturday evenings after his bath, before dinner.

The first time we measured, he came out at 28.5% body fat. Not good at all.

That first week, he was very motivated – after all, his precious iPad time depended on it – and he voluntarily cut his portions.

“Dad, I’ll just have half of the pizza (instead of the usual amount).”

The following Saturday, we saw that his efforts paid off. He was down to 27.0%.

But the next week he slacked off. I think he thought that he would not have to keep working at it.

His body fat went right back up to where it was before.

So the third week he was again determined to lose the fat. He spoke to Mom about the “big test” that would be coming up. He wanted to eat less.

And on Saturday, when he stepped on the scale, he had his best showing yet.

Our goal for this is not so much for Kai to hit a particular number. Rather, it is to instill in him good eating, exercise, and lifestyle habits that will hopefully stay with him for the rest of his life.

Hopefully he won’t just rollercoaster, going down one week only to go back up the next. It will probably take a lot of persistence on our part to keep him focused on the big picture.

But for his long-term health, it is critical to build good habits from an early age. Let’s see how we do.

Our Memorial Day

Beach

The water was cold, even for Kai.

Barbeque

Well, it was indoors, but we had ribs, corn on the cob, cole slaw, and baked beans. Yum!

Birthday

My dad's birthday is this week. My wife made made the birthday cake out of Jell-O and pound cake, and topped it with home-made whipped cream and strawberries and blueberries to give it the patriotic look on Memorial Day.


Hope you had a nice holiday as well.

Spring Planting

We went to cemetery last weekend to plant some annuals at the grave of my wife's first husband, Kai's biological father.

We have been doing this with Kai since he was quite young, perhaps since he was four years old. Back then, he never questioned anything. Of course, for a long time, he was not capable of asking questions, but even after he was, he did not seem curious about why we were there.

At that point, we had not yet explained to him his family history, and he did not seem to pick up on any clues about it. He did not question why his grandparents were Caucasian when me and my wife were Asian. And at the cemetery, he did not seem to notice that the last name on the gravestone matched that of his grandparents.

But he always enjoyed going to there to plant flowers. Any reason to play with dirt was good with him.

In the past few years, though, as we have talked to him about his family, he seems to understand why we go there. And he seems more curious, asking the kind of questions that kids ask, I guess.

"Where is he buried?"

"Who dug the hole?"

"How deep was it?"

And he was very eager to help with the planting. He dug holes, placed the small plants in, and compacted the dirt around them the way I showed him.

And though we did not talk about it, I think my wife was thinking that her late husband would be very happy that Kai was there helping to plant the flowers, and that he was growing up to be a fine boy.

Outing with Friends

One of my son’s friends at school invited Kai along with a small group of kids to go to Brookfield Zoo yesterday to celebrate the boy’s birthday. The boy’s mother would be picking up each of the kids and they would drive to the zoo together.

We were thrilled that Kai was invited, but also nervous about letting him go without one of us there with him. We had never dropped him off at any birthday party, always choosing to stay with him even if the party was not far from home. This party would be long; Kai would be gone for about 5 hours including the 45-minute car ride each way. If a problem arose at the zoo, we wouldn’t be able to get there quickly.

Furthermore, Kai has not shown much interest in zoos. When Kai was much younger, we occasionally took him to Lincoln Park Zoo, located in the city. But he did not show much interest in the animals, he usually ended up upset, and we always wondered why we bothered taking him.

So it has been a long time since we went to a zoo.

After thinking about all of this, my wife reached out to the mother of the boy and told her that Kai had never been dropped off at a party before. The mother was very understanding, telling my wife that she was welcome to come with, or she and Kai could drive separately in case they needed to leave early. We wanted Kai to spend time with the other kids, so my wife accepted the offer to go along with Kai and the others in the same car.

After all that worrying, I’m happy to report that all went well yesterday. Kai and all the boys had a very nice time.

Here you see him at his favorite venue, Stingray Bay, where you can touch the rays as they swim by.

It was nice to see that he could handle such a long outing with other kids.

Maybe next time we will let him go by himself.

A Happy Mother’s Day

We started out Mother’s Day with our usual weekend run first thing in the morning. Then we gave Mom our cards and a present.

After breakfast, Kai and I washed her car.

Though I think Kai soaked himself with the bucket of soapy water more than he soaked the car.

Ha, I guess he still has sensory issues. It reminded us that when Kai was much younger, we used let him rub shaving cream all over his body and he enjoyed sliding around on the floor.

After that we went out for lunch at one of our favorite hot dog/Mexican joints. Then, while Kai went to his exercise group, my wife and I took in a flea market.

For dinner, we had tentatively planned on taking Kai to his first Greek restaurant, but we were still feeling heavy from lunch so we decided to go to a Japanese restaurant instead.

Kai had his favorites – miso soup, shrimp tempura, and pieces of shrimp and octopus sushi. My wife and I each had the miso soup, gomae (spinach with sesame dressing), and sashimi plate.

When we got home, Kai whined just a bit when I asked him to play piano.

“But, Dad, it’s Mother’s Day>”

Yes, that’s right. It is not Kid’s Day, it’s Mother’s Day, so you should play extra nice for Mom.

He grumbled a bit more, but he played.

And overall he did very little grumbling.

It really was a very happy Mother’s Day.

Hope yours was nice, too.

“All About Mom”

Kai made a mother’s day card at school.

My wife thought much of the sentiments that Kai filled out were funny…

I think her favorite part is “My mom is 21 (real life 49) years old.”

Here’s the back cover of the card (Excuse the spelling error)...

Wishing all of you moms out there a very happy Mother’s Day.

Nature Center and Musical Theater

A week ago, my wife and I had gone to see my dad without Kai when Kai was with his mentor from school. Kai expressed disappointment, saying that he wanted to see Ojiichan, too. So this weekend we scheduled a visit with Kai.

There is a nature center very close to the assisted living facility where my dad now lives. Kai has been there before with his mentor, but the rest of us wanted to go see it for the first time.

My dad loves nature, and Kai is very much into anything science related, so this was a good choice for an outing.

The visitor center had a number of exhibits with skeletons, antlers, mounted animals, and other artifacts, along with a few live animals. Kai enjoyed taking us around the whole place.

Below you see him checking out one of several live snakes they had.

And here you see a kestrel, a hawk-like bird, eating a dead mouse.

It was good to find an activity to do with my dad that he and Kai both enjoy.

* * * * *
The next day, we took Kai to see a live performance of School House Rock, a musical based on the ‘70s animated television series.

When Kai was younger, he loved getting the School House Rock dvds from our library. The songs were fun and they taught children about grammar, math, science, and social studies, among other things.

It has been at least a couple of years since he’s looked at those videos, but he still wanted to go see the show.

This production was specifically aimed for kids, and its one-hour length was about right for Kai. He has sat through longer shows, but two hours is still a bit long for him.

This one featured about 15 of the best School House Rock songs including Conjunction Junction; Three Is A Magic Number; Lolly, Lolly, Lolly, Get Your Adverbs Here; I’m Just A Bill; and my favorite, Interjections!

Kai said he enjoyed it. I did, too.

Especially appreciating that taking him to places like this is no longer the stressful event that it once was. And that is deserving of an interjection – Hooray!