Finding a New Man for Mom

Yesterday’s homework assignment was particularly difficult for my son. He had to read a short story, tell four things that happened in the story, and then predict two things that have yet to occur. Predicting outcomes is often difficult for kids with autism, and that is no different with Kai.

When you ask him what might happen next in a story, he will usually say he does not know. And he does not like to guess. If you encourage him to try guessing, he sometimes will tell you something that already happened. But, mostly he just hates to be asked.

He wasn’t supposed to have this assignment for homework. He was supposed to have completed it in school. But, as near as we can tell, he protested and refused to do it. When they ran out of time at school, they sent it home as homework.

And so it fell to me to get him to do this dreaded assignment.

Kai whined and complained. I tried to be patient and encouraging, knowing that this type of assignment is hard for him. But, I wanted him to at least try. If he tried, I would help him. But, as time went on and he continued to complain and made no effort to begin working on it, I lost my patience.

I raised my voice with him and threatened that he would not get dessert that night if he did not get started on the homework.

He got mad.

He told me that I was being mean. He said, “Sometimes you’re nice but sometimes you’re not.” Yep, kid, that is the lot of a parent. Sometimes we’re not nice.

Then, he followed that up with, “I want a new dad.”

He said, “I’m going to find Mom a new wife.” He meant a new husband, of course, but he got the words mixed up. He corrected himself. “I am going to find Mom a new man.”

I couldn’t help but laugh. I tried to picture my son going out and finding a man for my wife. My son, the matchmaker. I wondered what kind of man he would pick for her.

But, alas, that will not happen right now. When I refused to budge, Kai calmed down and finally started the homework. He struggled, but I helped him and we got it done. Afterward, we played and he was happy with me again.

And so, there will be no new man for my wife. She is stuck with me.

At least until the next time we have a tough homework assignment, anyway.